if i was your boyfriend id never let you go. id sew myself onto your body. we are permanently bonded.
[walks into pet store puppy area wearing a huge coat]
[shuffles quickly out of pet store in a much tighter fitting coat]
I STEPPED ON A FUCKING LEAF AND AT THE SAME TIME SOME KID SCREAMED I THOUGHT IT WAS THE FUCKIN LEAF OMG
why do we always have to reblog my mistakes
fun fact: if a persons body odor smells good to you that means they have an immune system basically opposite of yours! this happens so the chances of finding a mate with the opposite immune system is greater and the chances that any offspring you produce together will have a stronger immune system is greater.
this is fascinating
stop replacing mirrors with ‘you look fine’ signs i know i look fine that’s why i want to look in the mirror